If ever there was a symbol to epitomise life in Australia as a kid during the 90s, it would be a good old-fashioned slice of Fairy Bread.
I don’t want to over dramatise here (and don’t you DARE come at me Gen Z, the 90s and Fairy Bread were a damn delight) but it just might be the most important thing to ever be invented by Australians.
So you can imagine my horror then, when American TikTok user @lunnchboxdad tried to make out like his abomination was in any way linked to our national treasure.
“How to make a #fairybread sandwich!” he titles the video, before proceeding to pervert the whole thing. It’s not even a sandwich, mate. It’s open pieces of bread cut into triangles, idiot.
Next he STARTS by cutting off the crust. This is clearly the final step for any sandwich, so I shouldn’t have to explain why that’s ridiculous.
But then, THEN, he really puts me over the edge. Despite his disclaimer asking Aussies not to get mad at him, I am furious. He completely ignores the use of butter — literally one of only two toppings that actually make it Fairy Bread — and slathers on peanut butter instead.
No. This is wrong.
Peanut butter and honey? Sure. Peanut butter and chocolate? Delicious. Peanut butter and SPRINKLES on a SANDWICH? Absolutely go home, you’re obviously drunk. Especially as he had the nerve to call it Fairy Bread. There are no ‘fun twists’ on Fairy Bread — it’s bread, butter and sprinkles.
I mean, if we’re really getting nit-picky — which I obviously am — they’re also the wrong type of sprinkles. The ones he uses are obviously for cakes, Fairy Bread calls for a smaller, crunchier sprinkle.
In conclusion, Americans might usually be good at mixing peanut butter with things, they are TERRIBLE at Fairy Bread.
(Lead Image: Unsplash / Diane Alkier)
Kassia is the Editor of AWOL, and a straight-up travel addict. She was born without a sense of direction, yet an intense desire to explore the world. As such, she's lost 90% of the time but she's learned to roll with it. You can catch her latest adventures on Instagram @probably_kassia.